I've HAD IT!

I've had it with food and late-night hungry, and either eating when I'm not hungry or not eating when I am hungy. With the contridictory information and the lack of hard science. By the changing trends and the changing diets and feeling helpless because no matter what nothing I do seems intuitive for MY body. We won't even mention that this is the first summer that I haven't automatically been able to take off the 5-8 pounds I gain over every winter off by just doing my normal summer routine (more activity due to longer days at the stable etc.).

The human body adapts remarkably well. I guess I should take it as a compliment that my body does as well on a vegietarian diet as it does a low-carb. That as long as I'm not eating fast food, my body is relatively happy. That apart from a dairy intolerance during the last stages of training during my second marathon, I'm not allergic to any food and tolerate everything pretty well. Except copious amounts of sugar. I can DEFINATLY feel the effects that particular binge.

But I'm tired of constantly changing my eating philosophy. I'm not a fad dieter and never have been - I'm committed to a lifestyle change, but the question is which one?

I moved from low cal to vegitarian. Then to "South Beach" (low carb). Then to eating "clean" with leftover philosophies from South Beach. Then to "don't eat out for a month - only black coffee can I purchase outside the grocery store". Then to intermittent fasting (14 hours at a time).

So what's the problem? I don't like any of them in whole and there were things I disagreed with in each. So I attempt stitch together a philosophy that I feel makes sense and I can live with for the rest of my life.

Here are the constants:

• Eat clean. No long labels, nothing proccesed (if I have a choice).
• Dairy is fine. I love milk and plain yogart. I like cheese, but I can also leave it as a special treat if needed. I know a lot of people out there disagree with me, but I have specific reasons for eating dairy both personal and global and as long as it continues to agree with me (and having gone through a period of disagreeance....I feel like I'm "in tune") I will continue to consume it.
• Limit Caffiene. Don't have any at all if I have a choice.
• I'm not willing to count calories or carbs for longer than 2 weeks.

My frusteration stems for the mulitude of contridictions in the "other stuff":

• go low fat, incorporating whole grains in a mostly veggie and lean meat diet?
• cut out carbs except for a very few on a limited basis? Don't worry as much about fat?
• Cut out carbs AND other things like legumes in addition....
• Calories in versus calories out being the only basis for weight loss and health?
• Excessive exercise makes you hungrier and therefore could cause an increase in consumption of food (and crave exactly the wrong sort).
• Eat 3 meals a day or 5 smaller ones (BTW - it's extremely hard for me to do this because of my small size it's hard for me to get 4 or 5 small meals in a day and not eat too much food).
• Eat breakfast, or don't eat until you are hungry in the morning?

I know what feels best and I know what's sustainable (and those are two different things). Somewhere I need to find a middle ground, because getting frusterated and throwing in the towel and becoming unmovitated and depressed about this is ridiculous.

And I haven't even gotten to the exercise portion of the equation. I fortunate that I LIKE exercising. I'm not so hung up about getting all my work outs in now as I used to be as I've accepted nutrition is a bigger part of the equation, but the fact still remains that there is a LOT to do a too little time to do it. And the big question: how do I balance cardio with strength training?

• endurance cardio
• Sprint cardio
• Strength training
• Flexibility
• Gymnastic strength
• off days
• light days
• etc etc etc etc

Not to mention complicating this whole ordeal is me dealing with chronic injuries that affect how I can work out. Yes, they are better BUT, especially with the achilles, I have to be careful. Even now, I pissed it off royally by wearing 4 inch heels at a work party 3 weeks ago and I'm still paying for it with soreness and pain all day long. And no, it wasn't worth it.

And somewhere in all this there is a horse, and a job, and family, and a boyfriend.

So what AM I going to do?

For starters I'm not doing ANY drastic changes before Tevis. That would be stupid. Overall I'm doing just fine. Yes, I would like to make changes, but for now all I can do is minor tweaks and resolve (once again) to stick to my principles. *sigh*

Nutrition

• Eat Clean.
• Don't eat out except for black coffee. No excuses. During unavoidable work functions, order a salad.
• Focus on whole grains and fruit when eating carbs. Try to focus on veggies and protein but don't get hung up on it.
• No eating after 7pm. Try to make it 6pm, but 7pm is the absolute limit in case I go for a run or eat late after going to the stable.
• No liquid calories except for milk
• At least for now, keep the slim fast shakes in the truck as "emergency" food. These work great if I accidentally screw up and end up VERY hungry and I feel like I MUST go through a drive-in for fast food. They aren't ideal, but they are better than the alternative and will help me to stop the habit of using fast food as a remedy for my lack of planning!

Exercise

• Continue to run at the limited amount allowed by the doc (I'm up to a whole 12 minutes...)
• Walk every day
• 4-5 times a week break out the jump rope, exercise ball, and my functional strength stuff. Alternate upperbody/core and lower body. Don't get hung up on any specific routine - just get into the habit of DOING it.
• 1-2 times a week do mat work, focusing on flexibility and core (pilates).
• Bike to the stable "a couple" times a week (target - 3x)
• This is much more likely to happen if I move all my equipment to my stable like last summer.....

Future

After Tevis, reevaluate and determine if what I need to change. Do one change at a time and go slowly. The goal is to have something that works (both nutritionally and exercise) that WORKS over the winter, historically my toughest time of the year. I've tried the cold-turkey thing when it comes to lifestyle change. Maybe it's time to try the baby steps approach.

Thank you for letting me vent.